When I Was Your Age

Let me tell you, sonny. Let me set you straight
You kids today ain't never had it rough
Always had everything handed to you on a silver plate
You lazy brats think nothing's good enoughWell, nobody ever drove me to school when it was ninety degrees below
We had to walk butt naked through forty miles of snow
Worked in the coal mine twenty two hours a day for just half a cent
Had to sell my internal organs just to pay the rentWhen I was your age. When I was your age
When I was your age. When I was your ageLet me tell you something, you whiny little snot
There's something wrong with all you kids today
You just don't appreciate all the things you've got
We were hungry, broke and miserable
And we liked it better that wayThere were seventythree of us living in a cardboard box
All I got for Christmas was a lousy bag of rocks
Every night for dinner we had a big chunk of dirt
If we were really good we didn't get dessertWhen I was your age. When I was your age
When I was your age. When I was your ageDidn't have no telephone didn't have no FAX machine
All we had was a couple of cans and a crummy piece of string
Didn't have no swimming pool when I was just a lad
Our neighbor's septic tank was the closest thing we had
Didn't have no dental floss had to use old rusty nails
Didn't have Nintendo, we just poured salt on snails
Didn't have no water bed, had to sleep on broken glass
Didn't have no lawnmower, we used our teeth to cut the grassWhat's the matter now, sonny, you say you don't believe this junk?
You think my story's wearin' kinda thin?
I tell you one thing, I never was such a disrespectful punk
Back in my time, we had a thing called disciplineDad would whop us every night till a quarter after twelve
Then he'd get too tired and he'd make us whop ourselves
Then he'd chop me into pieces and play frisbee with my brain
And let me tell ya, Junior, you never heard me complainWhen I was your age. When I was your age
When I was your age. When I was your age